by Martin Anton Smith

Welcome To ‘The Bleedin’ Gums Bulletin’

Sponsored By The Good Folks At ‘Vacuumup YurMissus’

The Better Mental Health Psychiatrists

I’m Your Host

Dr Riven Umadd

In World News Today

We Talk Of The New Worldwide Catastrophe

The Attack Of The Mellow Fat Chicks

Began As The Worlds Eyes Were Averted

And Angled Towards War & Pestilence

The World Was Made Aware Via Sound

A Low Rumble Of Misshapen Feet Hitting Dirt

And Then Rising To A Squelch As Rains Set In

No One Had Seen This Day Coming

Except The Corrupt Corporate Lolly Sellers

They Knew Their Greed Would End This Way

They Knew Their Addictive Sugars

Would Create An Unhappy Addicted Army

Who Would One Day Release The Pent-Up Anger

Of That Under The Radar Molecule Called Sucrose

I Will Elaborate More As The War’s Fog Lifts

Although I Have Some Late Breaking News In My Ear

There Are Reports Of The Army Of Mellow Fat Chicks

Sporting Bulges In Their Pants – Some Say These Are Dicks

While Others Contend, They Are Merely Uzi Machine Guns

Tune In Again In When We Talk TO The Leader Of The M.F.C

We Ask Ms Swee T. Ooth The Question On All Our Lips:

Who Made Your Fabulously Multicolour Pointillistic Footwear

& Beautifully Brilliant Billowy Butterscotch Blouses?

I’m Dr Riven Umadd

And You’ve Been Sufferin’

The Bleedin’ Gums Bullitin