Category: Lies

Listen here:

The most common form of “Stolen Valour” is not someone posing as an Ex-Army Vet,

No Sir, that prize belongs to the ‘Fabricator’ that pretends to be an ‘Engineer’.

But should we really be surprised when a “Fabricator” is also a “Liar”?

I mean semantically the two words mean the same thing.

Words have Power.

Maybe this is why Fabricators love to call themselves “Engineers”.

But consider the brute facts:

Engineers don’t weld Trailor’s – Fabricators do.

Engineers can do higher math – Fabricators can’t.

Engineers have letters after their names – Fabricators dropped out of high school.

Engineers can ‘eat time’ – Fabricators are impatient.

Engineers live on the hill – Fabricators are willing to die on it.

But it would be a mistake to be snobby about Fabricators –

Society needs them – as weirdly we still need Well Welded Trailers just as much as we do Bridges, Cars, Computers & Aeroplanes.

A fabricator is an “essential worker”.

And a Fabricator can ‘Smell a Rat’ better than anyone – in true working-class fashion.

And there are more “Rats” out there than ever these days.

And let’s not forget the stereotype of the “arrogant engineer” – for there is an ounce truth in every stereotype.

However, Another Godlier Profession Trumps Both the Engineer & the Fabricator:

Those Awesome Physicists – The ‘Rockstars’ of Science’.

Yes, Physicists ‘lie’ – but these are “white lies” and used only to simplify their equations,

& so you – a total boob – can understand them.

There was a story about a Physicist caught ‘lying’ once,

But this was just hearsay as heard by a disgruntled Fabricator,

While eavesdropping on an Engineer, who sneakily called himself a Physicist.

What’s that you say?

About Physicist Richard Feynman?

About his supposed immorality?

Yes, he lied but only about his naughty deeds with his colleague’s wives – never about Physics.

Thus, the status of the worlds Physicists remains where it should be,

right next to the ‘God Particle’.

But then again, a Physicist often doesn’t wash for days & weeks while working on a tough equation.

And I ask you – should we all be forced to wear pegs on our noses for the sake of scientific progress?

So, I as judge, must call it a three-way tie between all the bastards.

The Fabricator, The Engineer, & the Physicist are all equally Good & Bad.

P.S. A near sighted fool might have said this to compare & contrast the three:

One probably has boils, one boils his kettle a lot, & the other lectures on “Boyles law”.

–by Martin Anton Smith follow me on twitter/fb/Instagram: @mrschmitzo

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